I don't want to admit it. I really really don't. Because my entire life I've worked endlessly to build this perception to other people that I am a strong, independent, brave, fearless young lady who can take on the world. And everyone believes me.

But the problem is, it's all a lie. I am fearful. I am full of fear. I get really scared about a lot of things. A lot of things terrify me, which is fine. A lot of things terrify a lot of people. But I let it get to me. I purposely don't take once in a lifetime opportunities that are nearly handed to me because– I'm afraid.

But isn't that a silly reason to not do something? Fear? I literally let an intangible idea get the best of me. Me, Nikki Darling: the girl who has it all together and accomplishes everything she sets her mind to. But that's not the truth. It's a lie.

But this year I made the decision to not be fearful anymore. It's easier said than done, and obviously there are still so many moments in which I'm terrified and scared. But telling myself not to be afraid anymore puts me on the course to take so many opportunities I might not have otherwise taken because I was scared.

Fear is just fear. It's an idea we construct in our own minds, and something I've definitely constructed in mine. But I'm ready to start on the course of letting that go and find the happiness I will come upon by doing that.

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